He/I Didn't Stand a Chance

Now, on to the next one...


Upon starting my blog, I decided that I was not going to bring up “this situation”, but after a few months at it, I’ve decided that at this point I want to and I will. Hey - it’s my blog and I can write what I want…

After graduating from my beloved HU, I decided that I needed a break from our nation’s capital, so I moved to my beloved VA’s capital, Richmond, VA. My days of afternoon happy hours, Friday/Saturday night dresses and heels, and FINE black educated men were over! (Somebody should’ve warned me!) At the end of my first (horrible) year of teaching, “he” walks. He was like the first man I had seen in what felt like years, and (of course) he was an athlete. Neither of us stood a chance from jump…

To make a rather long and boring story short, a little less than a month later, to conclude the celebration of another 21st birthday, we went out for dinner. Before I know it, I’m heading into this “relationship” unsure of where it’s going. Rather than over-analyze things, I decide to go with the flow. At first, his game was good. I’ll admit I’m a sucker for that BS. You know walks in the park, trips down by the James (River), etc. Then one day, the honeymoon was over and the real BS began. First, it starts with me paying for more and more of the “dates” which was cool at first. (I like to eat out and I don’t really expect a man to treat me EVERY TIME we go out.) Then dates only happened if I said I wanted to go out or offered to treat…O_o. Eventually, our dates became outings with the two of us and his homeboy (luckily he was cool and probably reading this so #shoutout to him.). All of a sudden, it hit me. I was living my WORST nightmare. He was sitting on MY couch, watching MY TV, eating the food I bought and cooked. I felt as though I was getting a glimpse of what a future with him entailed… my heart stopped. I couldn’t and WOULDN’T live a life where I was bringing home the bacon, cooking it, and living based on his convenience.

It was down hill for him from there. After several attempts to end the relationship and admitting to him that I was looking for his replacement/upgrade, he was living on borrowed time. Living in RVA, this has been easier said than done, a year and a half later and still, I technically haven’t found a replacement here. For some odd reason, I couldn’t get out, that is, until… he “let me” out of the web I was seemingly tangled in.

He hopped on a plane, moved clear across the country without so much as a call, text, or Facebook message…

And 6 months later when he deemed it convenient to talk, he hit me up as though nothing had happened and everything is peachy. His conversations and memories hint to me that he believes he is/was the best thing to ever hit my life... (as if that was even close to the case...). And he continues to come at me with this nonsense...

But I would like to thank him. Through this relationship I feel that I grew to be more open. Unafraid to express myself. I've learned to be more appreciative of those qualities that I desire in a mate because they are clearly few and far between. As I look forward to new relationships I see in the future, I'm eager to grow with my mate (when he's found (if not already)). I cannot continue this trial and error/wtf was I thinking lifestyle? In the meantime, I’ll live by the words my brother-in-law Jay-Z..... "I'm on to the next one..."