You Must Not Know 'Bout Me... Really You Don't

What you say whispers, but what you do SCREAMS!

Have you ever sat across from someone and realized you know everything about him, but he has no clue who you are nor has a real interest in learning. O_o You sit through dinner and listen to him talk...about...well...himself. Finally, when you’re halfway through your meal, he seems to want to know more about you. He asks questions that are either pointless or somehow relate to him. You continue to interact with/go on dates with him, chalking that first experience to nerve-induced word vomit. Only, after a few more dates, it becomes apparent that “this guy has NO CLUE who I am.” He doesn’t know where I’m from, what college I attended (it’s on my license plate), my birthday (it was like a week ago and it’s on Facebook), and that I write a blog. These are just a few things I probably would’ve mentioned if he’d taken the time to ask or allowed me to get in a word edgewise.

When a man listens to you, it says a lot. Sitting across the table from a man who references something you said or shows his interest in you is a breath of fresh air. He brings you your favorite flower, remembers your birthday and actually makes an effort to contact you in some form or fashion (I say contact because I’ve gotten some interesting contacts on my birthday before), remembers little things and goes out of the way to make you laugh. Now ladies, some of us may have given up hope but they do exist!! I’ve seen them in real life... LOL

Ephiphany

And it comes to me like an EPIPHANY...

So a few weeks ago, it hit me that I was traveling down a road, and seeing all types of signs, but I wasn’t reading any of them. *Kanye shrugs*. Sometimes, you have to go down a road and experience it so you don’t look back on life and think "what if?"

Have you ever been driving down a road and you realize everything looks quite familiar? You discover that it’s not deja vu and you really have been there before. You know exactly where this road is leading and you would rather not make this trip again, so you tap the brake and head for the nearest exit.

Once you've slowed down, you realize you may not have seen the trees because of the forest (or whatever the saying is) and what you may have been looking for has been in front of you the entire time. I am extremely goal oriented and when I see something I want, I put forth a serious effort to get it. Sometimes everything doesn’t turn out as I envisioned, but I like to live life without regrets. Today, I think I can go forward, make this "move" and be confident in my choice. Sometimes it "be like that.”

5 Things to do as a Single Woman

Here are my 5 must-dos for a single woman.

Most women will not get married before the age 35. We all need something to do as we wait on Mr. Right!

5 - Do something fun! Enjoy life!

4 - Chill the fuck out! Your husband is coming (more than likely) and you need to enjoy your life RIGHT NOW!

3 - Learn something to make you better. Take a pole dancing class or a cooking class, etc. It’s the little things make life better/more enjoyable, and hey - your future Mr. won’t mind these little extras. ;-)

2- Save some money and work on the credit that you may or may not have totally disregarded in college! You may want to have a wedding or a buy a house someday. Let’s not forget those little expensive people that result from a happy union. Aside from that, it’s always nice to have a little money in the bank to cushion us from life’s unexpected blows, whether single or married.

1- See the world and travel! The world has SO much to offer. Go check it out! Have an Eat, Pray, Love moment! And there is no better time than now!

Recorded in beautiful Peurta Vallarta, Mexico.

We are Family

We Are Family

This is my first video blog...

Love your family.... you only get one....

Man I Love My Team

My people hold me down!

I am girl who has had the opportunity to call 3 areas in Virginia home: Martinsville, DMV, and now Richmond. I’ve encountered lots of people while living throughout the state. Each time that I’ve moved, I’ve added different people to “my team”. I don’t just meet people and automatically give them a spot my team, not everyone makes the final cut. Some are here because they are my business partners, some know ALL my business, some have shared common experiences and goals and others keep me grounded. The are just a few of the many reasons people are on my team. Now don’t get me wrong, it’s a possibility that some of my team members of my team may screw YOU over. Damn, a few members of my team have (and probably will again) screw me over (gotta keep it real) if given the opportunity. But please be reminded that they are here for a reason. My reasons are just that MINE. You are not allowed to choose who makes up my team nor do they solely define who I am. The connections and interactions I have will have an impact on my life, but who says to say if they will be positive or negative.... I do (for the most part). You cannot choose my team nor can I choose yours.

As you choose your team pick them for yourself and not for others....

Black Love

I am firm believer in following your heart. If you find someone you like or are interested in pursuing, GO FOR IT!! True love is hard to find. I know people who I feel who have made genuine connections that are not based on racial differences. In the movie Something New, the single black business woman finds love in her white (sexy as HELL) landscape architect. Let me just say I LOVE IT.

But I do have a problem with a particular type of black man who is by far not representative of all black men. Black women you KNOW the ones I’m speaking of - the ones who tend to stereotype, rather than appreciate us [regular old black women]. According to them, we have too many attitudes and mood swings, speak our minds a little too often and refuse to put up with their shit. We won’t be walked over and we will check you if necessary. You know, they think we are bitches. O_o They would much rather chase after the gorgeous girl who is not black or the one who doesn’t claim her African-American heritage. Now I’m not a hater andI have nothing but love for these women and I can’t blame them for loving the black men flock to them. My problem solely lies with the mentality of the “flockers.” I’m confused when it comes to them. What makes them feel that just because these women are not black they will make a better girlfriend, wife or mother? Maybe she does all the little pointless things that us regular old black women don’t. OH WAIT! I know many black women who do those things like folding socks a certain way, cooking hot dogs a special way, etc. They do these things for the men they adore who adore them in return. I look at the men with this mentality that I know personally, they were raised by their black mother. Are women with the same characteristics as their mothers not good enough? O_o The mothers I know who have raised these men seemed to have done a pretty decent job with them, aside from this one issue. In my opinion, their mentality is not only a slap in my face, but also their mothers’ as well.

I will say that not all hope is lost in black men making a black love connection. Not all men have that awful mentality. Some men in general LOVE a black woman. To you men out there, we appreciate your love! I am sure that there is a black leading lady out there for you that is the perfect fit. Thanks for not buying into to those awful stereotypes and continuing to appreciate our strengths while encouraging us past our weaknesses. Roger Ebert, Chris Rock, Will Smith, Jay-Z, and BARACK love their black leading ladies. This leading lady continues to look for her leading man.

My Man's Biggest Fan

I'll be a "stan" for him...

If you know me, you know that I am one of the biggest Beyonce fans EVER. I love me some King B. She can do no wrong. I know all of her music. I faithfully buy her albums, DVDs, and concert tickets. I am a stan. If I had to pick anybody on the earth to switch lives with, she is the only option. (Hey! I love being me. ;-) ). One thing that I love about her is her relationship with HER man Jay-Z. I love them!!!

Their relationship is not open to the public and they keep their intimate details very private. They are seen together but don’t publicize their relationship a lot. When they do, you can tell that they really do adore one another. In an interview, Beyonce admitted that she has always been a Jay-Z groupie. She has also been heard stating that she loves her some Jay-Z. All through out her music you can hear her love letters to her man. Jay-Z will tell you he has the hottest chic in the game. He even commented “Sometimes you need perspective. You’ve been right in front of greatness so often that you need to step back and see it again for the first time..” about a video he shared of Beyonce practicing for American Idol. Now don’t jump down my throat. No, I do not think their relationship is perfect. No relationship is nor will it be. He may or may not have a boo on the side (which is not okay... and he would be a damn fool.). But they both seem happy.

You may be wondering, “What does this have to do with my pursuit?” It does relate to me. I want to be that in love. I want my “non expressing emotion” self to be willing to announce to the world that I am “groupie” for my man (I’ve been a closet groupie a time or two) and be happy making that statement. Not only do I want to be that in love where I am announcing my love to the world, but I also want my man to feel the same way about me...like Jay-Z does about Beyonce. I want my man to announce that I am great and express his love and appreciation for me to the world. When I’ve met a man whom I can share that mutual feeling with, the non-expressive Keisha that you now know will be dead.