Girls Trip

So I went to see Girls Trip this weekend and last weekend. First, let me say that was AWESOME!!! It is definitely going to be one of those movies I watch over and over on Saturdays and Sundays in my pjs. I loved seeing those black women be just that, black women. I even loved the Howard Homecoming plug (not to mention the HU Alum in the movie)! This movie reminded of me of my girls trips to Miami, Vegas, Mexico, and even NOLA just to name a few, where I’ve definitely had some Girls Trip moments. *sigh* Good times! *looks off into the clouds*

As I watched this movie, I sat and tried to figure out which of these characters I would be in my various circles of friends. I can see myself in each of them. Although, regardless of the group of friends, I’d be that person in the mosquito net about to “catch something” at some point in each of my trips. LOL I love a shress and good time.  But, I really connected with Ryan. The person who also seems to have it all together when in real life, her life isn’t as “perfect” as it seems. She’s struggling with the “can women really have it all?” dilemma which I’m sure so many of us battle regularly. For her right now, she doesn’t. I’m not going to spoil it for those of you who haven’t seen it, but just know she has her struggles in the movie. I know we all struggle to know and accept our worth at times as we live out our disappointments, failures, and setbacks. I see(n) it and I’ve live(d) it.  Hell, I’ll be the first person to admit I struggle with this DAILY. She’s also is not as connected with her “girls” as she would like to be. Getting caught up in her own life as well as friend fall out, she and her frields have lost touch. I understand this. I have so many friends that I don’t see or talk to often but at the end of the day love is still there.

As I continue to walk this sometimes crooked path called my life I’ll look back on all my “Howard Homecoming/Graduation Keisha moments” with my girls and I smile and I’m thankful for those people who always have my back. We are all just trying to figure out what this thing called life has in store for us. I move forward, just trying to know my worth and requiring people to know it too!

Oh yea, to my Julian… I see you boo liking them post… *pulls down shades and looks over them*

What You Mean By That?

You ever had someone say something to you and in your head your go “Bitch! What you mean by that?” But you don’t say that, you just “smile and nod” and respond. Yea it happens to me and probably most us more than any of us would like to admit. The more I thought about it the more annoyed I got about this particular situation.

Let’s be real… I felt there were several things wrong with what was said. It was something along the lines of if the guy I had dated were to commit to me would I “keep myself up better”. For one, drawing on my eyebrows everyday ain’t. gonna. make.  no. man. want. me. HELL, this particular man didn’t want me at my Beyoncé. Which brings me to my next point, if a man doesn’t  want me at my Amanda Bynes crying in the dark hallway, he don’t deserve me at my Beyoncé looking good and slaying life. Which rolls right into, my next point. Bitch, I’m doing good to be standing, there are certainly days within the last few months I’ve been hella close to being that falling apart famous girl, we see in the media. But you’d never know. I’m doing the best I can to hold it all together. And even when I didn’t have a hold of it all, I still managed to get it all done. So nope my eyebrows aren’t drawn on and my hair is still in this tired ass ponytail but check the trail of glitter I left behind. When it’s all said and done people may not remember me for being fly as hell everyday but I’ll have more hearts that I can count that will remember to be their best selves because of me. But no worries, at my memorial they’ll be a fly ass face beat pic on my index card obituary and no casket, so the Llyods of the world will know I was “fine too”. LOL *wink face* *sashays in to the sunset with a hair flip*  

I Made It

And I can slay some fabric!

Well I’ve made it through another year of this thang called life.  The last year ended and this new one started at a rocky point but I am still standing. This year (like them all) has taught me so many lessons. From being hired to do a job and wanting to see a black man succeed to later realizing he is an ASSHOLE who can’t take feedback to grow. That opportunity allowed for me to learn how to stand up for myself and realize when it’s time to let things go. I can’t help all black people be the best version of themselves. Sometimes they don’t want this little black girl’s help. I’ve also been extremely frustrated when you are doing more than what is required and that is not being appreciated. I face a regular internal struggle when parents are unappreciative but the girls I work with are AMAZING. I really enjoying being able to bless them with experiences and skills but some parents make me want to be like “screw this”. On the flipside, I have the other parents who appreciative willing to do what they can to help! I’ve been reminded that a sense of entitlement is real in some people. Some people feel like you owe them something and others are thankful of what you do. I have to take the good with the bad in my attempt to empower young women of the future. I use these opportunity to hopefully show the girls to support one another and be appreciative of the things they are given. In addition, I’ve learned to let go and let it flow in certain areas of my life. It shall be what it will be and sometimes that is nothing. I’m okay with that.  What’s for me is for me. I can’t control everything and my life looks nothing like what I thought it would at this point of my life. So many around me are living the life I envisioned for myself.  I’m continuing to trust the journey of this thing called my life. Trust and believe that it is not always easy trusting my journey but at the end of the day, at this ripe young age of “25” I am blessed. My bills are paid, I eat well, and I work in areas I am passionate about. I have an amazing support system around me to help me keep my sanity when needed. I’m ready for what this next year has to offer me hopefully more good than bad!